Tuesday, November 16, 2004

Don't Touch that Dial!

It happened again this morning, for the third or fourth time in a week.

The phone rings. I am always in the middle of something, so a ringing phone frequently signifies an unwelcome interruption. So I go answer the phone and apparently there's nothing on the other end. I had to say "hello" several times. I hate that. But sometimes it's one of my kids, who haven't quite mastered phone etiquette, so I stay on to give them (if it's them) the benefit of the doubt. Finally I hear a "click," immediately tipping me off that there's a machine on the other side that requires voice activation before it will "say" anything in response to your greeting. I play with these sometimes. I just answer the phone and don't say anything, and the system doesn't know what to do.

It is my policy always to immediately hang up if a live person isn't on the other end.

Of all things, this stupid system then goes to a taped message saying, "Please hold for an important message. All of our agents are currently busy." As if one of these systems is not enough, there's another of the same type that says, "Please hold. All of our representatives are on other calls." Well, then let them call when they're ready to call, not before so they can waste my time!

Honest to Pete! A friggin' MACHINE calls me up only to put me on HOLD, and whoever this system belongs to actually thinks I am going to wait around on THEIR non-human hold when I didn't even call them and don't even know who they are! Stand forth and identify yourself!

Of course, I'll never find out who they are and they'll never manage to contact me, because I'm compelled to hang up on anything SO RUDE. Screw 'em! I would never do any sort of business with such an inconsiderate entity. What kind of customer care is that? If you want to do business, you have to be considerate of your target market! Perhaps it is someone who doesn't WANT to be identified, because I might hang up . . . therefore, in turn, I definitely have no time for them. And I'm hanging up anyway.

So quit auto-dialing that phone and leave me alone. And, by the way, I'm on the national do not call registry. The only people who can call here must already have established business relationship with us. So you're in violation of the law, and I WILL report you.



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